How to take a shower

Someone forwarded this email to me today at work. I just had to share. It's so dang funny. I swear someone must have a camera in my bathroom!

Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
>>>
>>> Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according
>>> to lights and darks.
>>>
>>> Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
>>> along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>>>
>>> Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make mental note to do
>>> : more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
>>>
>>> Get in the shower.
>>>
>>> Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and
>>> pumice stone.
>
>>> Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
>
>>> Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
>>>
>>> Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
>>>
>>> Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
>>> until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
>>>
>>> Rinse conditioner off hair.
>>>
>>> Turn off shower.
>>>
>>> Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
>>>
>>> Get out of shower.
>>>
>>> Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super
>>> absorbent towel.
>>>
>>> Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
>>>
>>> If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>>>
>>> Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
>>>
>>> Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
>>> in a pile.
>>>
>>> Walk naked to the bathroom.
>>>
>>> If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her while making the
>>> woo-woo sound.
>>>
>>> Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your
>>> wiener and scratch your butt.
>>>
>>> Get in the shower.
>>>
>>> Wash your face.
>>>
>>> Wash your armpits.
>>>
>>> Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.
>>>
>>> Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
>>>
>>> Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>>>
>>> Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
>>>
>>> Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
>>>
>>> Pee.
>>>
>>> Rinse off and get out of shower.
>>>
>>> Partially dry off - Fail to notice water on floor because curtain
>>> was hanging out of tub the whole time.
>>>
>>> Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>>>
>>> Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>>>
>>> Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
>>>
>>> If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
>>> woo-woo sound again.
>>>
>>> Throw wet towel on her pillow.
>>>
I thought this was hilarious!
Have a good Friday everybody!