Thursday, October 15, 2009

The Season of Scare.

Is it mean to find great joy in scaring the heck out of your own kids? Maybe. But, dang it's fun!!
I realize this story might not come across as funny when reading it. It might just be one of those 'had to be there' type stories. And if it does, let me apologize in advance. But it's one that needs to be written down so I don't forget. It was pure and classic hilarity and fright at it's best. And I should have had my camera out, but didn't. And I should have had the video camera out and didn't do that either!
Yesterday afternoon seemed to be a typical Wednesday afternoon. Dinner was in the oven, the kids were outside playing and Pete should be home any minute. Right around 5 o' clock, the phone rings and it's Pete calling to say he's on his way home and should be there in a few minutes. He also adds in to not let the kids know he's coming and for me to open the side door to the garage.
"What's going on?", I ask.
"Oh nothing. I just bought this scary mask and I want to see if it scares the kids."
Awwwesome I think to myself. However, I'm wondering just how 'scary' the mask really is. I told him that Megan and I had already been to the Halloween store today and I'm not sure how scared she'll really be because she wasn't at all scared in there. I also make sure to tell him not to open the garage door because then they'll for sure know he's home. We want this to be a pure surprise attack. (evil parents that we are)
So, he gets home and goes directly into the side door of the garage. The kids have no idea he's home. He grabs this ginormous game bag made of canvas. (A game bag is for putting the meat in when you're hunting so the meat doesn't go bad.) This one was big enough that it went all the way down and covered his feet. He cut a hole in the top for his head and put the mask on over his face. (I will be taking a picture at some point for reference) Megan and I were sitting in the house. I was trying to keep her occupied so she wouldn't see him coming. He came in through the patio door and didn't say a word. Just looked straight at us and kept coming closer. Poor Megan just froze. She didn't know what to think. Then she just started screaming and then laughing and then screaming again.
But that's not really the funny part of the story.
During all this, Jake is still playing outside and has no idea what has just happened and has no idea Daddy is home. We had to get him too. It just wouldn't be fair to poor Megan. Who, by the way, was very relieved to see her daddy under that sheet and mask.
So I went out front and called Jake to come in to "finish up some homework". Pete was hiding in costume behind the front door. Jake reluctantly came in and didn't even notice the big monster standing behind him. He walked towards the back of the house to use the bathroom. At the end of that hall is a big mirror that looks all the way back to the front door. He looks up and all of a sudden notices the big scary monster creeping up behind him. Oh my gosh, I don't know why I didn't have the video camera out! It was the funniest thing ever. His eyes got HUGE he says very quietly, "oh no....oh no!! Ah. Ah. Ah. Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!" As he runs for his life to the bathroom looking in the mirror the entire way. I mean, ironically, it was exactly like in Scooby Doo when Shaggy and Scooby are so scared and Shaggy says "ZOINKS!" and their legs move to run as fast as they can, but they go no where. You know what I mean? It was exactly like that. I was laughing so hard I thought I was going to puke. It was classic. The kid thought he was done, for sure.
When Pete finally took the mask off and Jake came out of the bathroom he was so embarrassed. It was cute though. He took it in stride and then was all, "I wasn't that scared." Yeah right. But he did laugh. He was a good sport.
Megan on the other hand....You know, I really didn't think she was that scared. But apparently it totally freaked her out. Pete had taken the sheet thing off and wrapped the scary mask inside of it and then just set it on the stairs. Well Megan would. not. go up there. At all. You couldn't even see the mask, but she knew it was there. She was like, there's no way I'm going up there till you get that thing out of the house! We had to put it in the garage and tell her we threw it away! After that she was fine.
So, is it horrible of us to find such pleasure in this? Some might think so. But don't we, as parents, have the right to play 'Boogie Man' every now and then just for fun? Isn't it written in the Parents Handbook?


Anonymous said...

OMG! That's too funny! Aparently Megan is still scared because when you called me from Target yesterday she was freakin' out about going down the Halloween isle! You've probably scared her for life as I'm sure your dad and I did to you at some point!

camport said...

I must be a bad parent, then, b/c that is freakin' hilarious and totally something Sean would do{and I would encourage}! You should do it again, but with the video camera this time. Then again, you may ruin your children's love of sleep if you keep pulling stunts like that.


Kelly DaCosta said...

That is so funny! I am now thinking of ways to scare my boys. Pure Genius I tell you!

nicole said...

funny! and i totally know what you mean - part of you feels bad but part is so funny - lauren we have to be more carefully with - she is very scared and sensitive anyway -but the boys really get a kick out of it too :)

Melissa said...

i laughed! that is the BEST!!!

Jude said...

oh my... i must admit, I used to play a little talking toy because Lincoln waould get this freaked out look on his face! ;)