Just a bunch of random stuff...

Seems like I've had a lot of just random stuff lately! This year...or the last maybe 6 months or so, has been a roller coaster of ups and downs. Unfortunately, it sure seems like there has been a lot more downs, than ups. I'm just burnt out on emotions right now. I'm tired of struggling every month to pay bills, and feeling a rush of guilty anxiety every time I swipe my ATM card. And then there's the passing of my grandma....I really haven't even began to deal with those emotions yet. It still hasn't even sunk in. I went to Costco on Thursday....mostly because I didn't know what else to do with myself. So I bought 5lbs of strawberries and a thing of their rotisserie chicken salad. That's all I ate for 3 days. Strawberries and chicken salad.......And I thought I wasn't an emotional eater. Hum...thinkin maybe I was wrong! LOL! *sigh* Well I know I'm still going to have some bad days coming...thinking about my grandma, but other than that I really want to get back to feeling myself again. Have you been to Kal's blog? Love Life. It's amazing how she can see so many good things in every day. I want to start being more like that. I don't want this to be a place where I come to complain (though, I KNOW that is still going to happen...everyone needs to vent) But I also want this to be a place where I can share and relish in the joys of life.
Scrapbooking/photography note: I think it was Chrissy's blog...the other day I was reading how much her husband gets mad at all the crazy picture taking...Girls! Stand up for your hobby! Stand up for photos! Tell your husbands to eat $#*! (j/k don't do that!) Tell them they need to help and take pictures of you too! I was just reminded this weekend how incredibly important it is to document our lives with photos and stories. My cousin and I spent a couple of hours going through a box of photos my grandma had. It was so amazing to see the passage of time over the last 85 years...the vacations they took, the birthdays, the parties...the everyday life! It took us quite a while to go through them all...and a lot of them didn't have any info on them at all, and some of them had little stories on the back. But all I was thinking when I was done was "I want more". I just couldn't get enough. I saw pictures of my mother when she was my age. She was GORGEOUS. Seriously. Not that she isn't now, but wow, she was just so pretty. Anyways, all I'm trying to say is keep doing what your doing. It really will be appreciated someday.
Kid update: Megan...well she is SOooooooo close to crawling. Last night she fell over on her tummy several times while trying to get something out of her reach. This usually makes her scream, but last night you could see the happy determination on her face. She barly has a bit of forward motion. She can get up on one knee, then she kind of pushes off with the other foot, causing her to inch forward a bit! It's so cute. Oh, and I know you're all going to think I'm nuts, but seriously, she has said her first word. Not counting ma- ma and da- da. She says "kitty". It's not clear as day or anything, but it is clearly two syllables kind of like "ta-ty" or something like that. And I know it's kitty that she's saying because she only says it when she sees the cat. I had heard her say it a couple of times over the weekend, and I wasn't quite sure I was hearing what I thought I was hearing. But then this morning I was getting ready to put her in the car...I was holding her and not really paying attention. The cat ran into the garage, Megan looks down right at her and says "ta-ty". So there you have it. Proof. My child is a genius! Ha!

National Scrapbook Day

Happy NSD! Just popping in to say hello, and thank you all for your comforting words over the last couple of days. It really does mean a lot to me. So, thank you.

Can you believe this hobby has it's own day? No, this is not just a fad! Scrapbooking has turned the crafting world upside down and brought women together all across the world. Amazing. My friend Chrissy got a huge honor of recognition today over at 2peas. She was highlighted today as basically, 'someone to watch'. And she is for sure. Way to go girl, you totally deserve it! And another scrapping note...please don't forget to check back next week at unpubbed for our first featured guest! It's gonna be good. And join in the fun, post your work...we can't wait to see it!

Ok, I'm off. Hope you have a great rest of your weekend!

Kathleen W. Smith

Or Kay to some, or Kat to her family. To me, she was Grandma. She went home to meet her Heavenly Father this morning, 5/3/07. She was 84 years old. She was a wonderful mother, grandmother, and wife to my Papa. She worked until she was about 72, I think, as a nurse. She was very active and was loved and respected by many of her younger colleagues. I used to go to her house after school...she loved to play games. She taught me how to play domino's and "Farkel", a dice game we always played at family gatherings. We did paint by numbers together, and she did her best to help me with my math homework. Even though she reminded me she got a "D" in math growing up. We went on walks through the neighborhood. She made beans and cornbread. She always had cornbread muffins. She crumbled hers up in a glass of milk and ate it, or drank it like that. I always thought that was gross. We always made homemade ice cream for mine and my Papa's birthdays...and oven steak and fried okra. She let me use her nursing cap for Halloween....more than once. When I was 15 I decided NOT to go on vacation with her and Papa...because i was too cool to be seen alone with my grandparents. I regretted it the second I said it...but didn't go anyways. So, when I was 20 and she asked me again to go to Texas with her, I didn't hesitate, and I said yes. It was me, grandma, her sister Betsy and her Brother Buddy and his wife. Just me and 4 old people! And I had the best time! I'll never forget how we got "lost" in Mexico and all 5 of us crammed into one taxi to get back to the border! The last few years she had been suffering from dementia...or severe short term memory loss. She'd ask you the same question 10 times in a 1/2 hour. But other than that, her body was basically healthy. I saw her just this last Saturday when I went to my moms for a visit. She seemed happy and in a good mood. She remembered my kids names. And held Megan the entire time we were there. She stood at her window and waived to us as we drove out. I had no idea what was to come this morning. It's amazing how we can take every day the Lord gives us for granted. But we do, because what else are we to do? No one can tell what will come next. And you can't spend you're whole life worrying about it. I've been blessed to have shared almost 30 years with this wonderful woman, and I will miss her more than I can imagine. But, I am comforted in knowing she is with Jesus, and Papa and her sister and brother....and she'll be waiting for me when I get there.

I love you Grandma!

Hey there!

Thanks for all the advice about my kids! I know they're not really strange...but sometimes you just have to wonder, you know?! If you've emailed me lately and haven't gotten a response...it's not because I don't like you...It's because my husband doesn't! LOL!! (blame it on the men, right? J/K) It's not really Pete's fault...It's just that there is not enough time in the day. A few weeks ago...well maybe about a month now...we came up with a pact. Basically a list of chores that each one of us must complete before we do anything else....So that things don't pile up till the weekend. One of us takes the upstairs and the other takes care of downstairs. The upstairs person gives the kids baths, gets them in PJ's and washes/dries/folds laundry as necessary. The downstairs person cleans up dinner, emtys/fills dishwasher as necessary, wipes counters and sweeps the floor. And every night Jake is in charge of cleaning the toy area and feeding his lizard. So, by the time we get all this stuff done and the kiddies to bed, it's 9 o'clock. And the alarm starts going at 5 o'clock in the morning. So by 9, we're pretty wiped out and I usually end up going to bed. So, sorry for not getting back to you all. I try to keep up at work with my blog buddies and groups, but that can be difficult too. And I can't even see my at home email from here. PUNKS! Every night lately I've been going home to at LEAST 50 emails a day! I wish I had more time to be really involved, in all I want to be involved in...you know?
Another note about Greys....I can not confirm that George is leaving. I'm only assuming so because there has been rumors flying around about it for months...and then last week when he tells Izzy he's transferring, I just thought "ok, that's his out", right? I thought that just kind of sealed the deal. But maybe I'm wrong. I guess this week is supposed to be a 2 hour show. :D
Yesterday, I ended my post with "hope your day is full of creative sunshine". I have no idea where I got that...it just came to me. And I've decided I really like it. So, this weekend I'm gonna try and incorporate that somehow to my banner. (mostly as a reminder for myself, but maybe for all of you too) Chris{tina}sy *wink* let us know what the dimensions are for the blog banner so I'm gonna give it a go this weekend and see what I can come up with! :D

You know....

I really hate blogger sometimes. I've said it before. Yesterday, I had this big ole post all typed out...with a picture and everything....pushed Publish...and *POOF* gone. "page can not be displayed". Freakin' heck that ticks me off! It happens to emails too. And then of course you have no energy to go back and type it all again. Plus, you can never remember all you said anyways.
Maybe it's a good thing. I feel like maybe my mouth has been running a little too fast lately. Like maybe I've said too much...or not known when to shut up. Yesterday, I really felt like I made some people mad. Some people I really don't want to be mad, you know? I felt like maybe my words were like the last straw....the straw that broke the proverbial "camels back". And then I had a major panic attack. No one said anything for the longest time. I got so nervous because I HATE confrontation. I want to live in a world where people are happy, happy all the time! I'm dreaming, I know. But I get knots in my tummy when I think anyone is mad at me...or if there is some kind of tense conversation going on around me...it doesn't even have to involve me. What is that about?! Yes, I know, I'm overly sensitive. Anyways, I think all is good now.
Anyways, on to other stuff....If you haven't checked out unpubbed yet, please do! And submit your layouts too! We'll be looking at each and every one. Who knows, we might just pick you for our next guest designer! We want you to have your 15 minutes too!
Megan turned 8 months old on Saturday. I can not believe she's that old all ready. And I can't believe it's May 1st! The year is flying by. So, she's 8 months and not crawling yet. She sits up and slaps her hands on the floor and she rocks back and forth...like she's trying to crawl. But she does nothing with her butt. Well sometimes she scoots a bit. If I put her on her tummy, she just looks like she's going for a swim. It's so funny, she just kicks her legs like crazy. Then, if I put her up on her hands and knees, she gets really mad and screams cuz she has no idea what to do. I guess she'll figure it out. I'm not too worried about it except for the fact that Jake was already crawling at this age. But you're not supposed to compare kids, right? She absolutely loves to stand up and pull up though...maybe she'll skip crawling.
Jake's head is much better. He's gonna have a pretty good scar though. Are all kids weird...or just mine? Sometimes I think Jake has OCD. So the other day it got up to like 95 degrees. Pretty hot for April, even in California. Anyways so he's getting ready for bed and he's putting on PJ's with long sleeves and long pants. I tell him it's too hot to wear those and give him another pair that is shorts and a T-shirt. He flips out...not really throwing a fit or anything. He's smart enough not to do that. But you can see it on his face that he's just mad about it. He gets tears in his eyes and says "I don't wanna wear these ones". I calmly explain that it's too hot to wear the other ones and then give him the option to just wear his underwear to bed if he wants. Anyways this back and forth stuff goes on and on for what seems like forever. Finally he puts on the shorts, but he's still upset about it. He gets in his bed, tells me good night and then says "but momma, I don't wanna wear these ones." After like 15 minutes has gone by. He's still fixed on these stupid shorts. Please tell me that my kid is not the only one who acts like that. Should I have just let him wear the other ones? I think we're both just stubborn. I want him to do it my way, and he wants to do it his. We're both Leo's. Maybe that's why.
Well, this is getting kind of boring isn't it? I don't have a whole lot to report. Seriously, yesterday's post that got lost was way better than this one. But I can't remember it all! Oh one more thing for you Grey's fans....I hate George and I'm glad he's leaving. I really like Callie...I think I'm in the minority there, but I do really like her. And what she said to Izzy in the elevator was great. She is so the bigger person. And I think the whole Izzy and George sleeping together thing was crazy...why couldn't they just stay friends? McDreamy is Mc-tickin' me off! He's being really selfish right now. Carrie....I know a lot of people don't like her. But for some reason, I can't help but like her. She is soooo self centered and I think she's kind of mean to Burke, but I can't help but like her for some reason.
Ok, well I'll leave you with that. Hope your day is full of creative sunshine :D

Warning...

My scanner sucks! But I'm through with messing around with it and photoshop. So here's my contribution to Chrissy's Circle Journal. The patterened paper is actually red, not orange....

This is hidden journalling and photo's behind the photo on page 2.This was so much fun, and i love how it turned out. I think you can click on the images for detail. As soon as I finish my sign in tag it will be off to Jude in the mail!

I'd write some more....but I'm kinda sleepy and everyone is watching a movie. So I think I'm gonna grab a spot and snuggle up!

It's 10:58 am...

And I'm so freakin bored. la la la la BORED. I'm hangin out here in my big cubicle trying to look like I've got something to do. There is not much going on in the bloggy world lately. I've been to them all I think! I feel guilty surfing around on the internet all day...especially being the new girl. But seriously, what the heck else am I supposed to do? I have to keep reminding myself that this is less stress, and that's what I wanted....right? Right.
So back to the ranch...Melissa asked me about it...So I'll give another little rundown. I don't post about it much. No real reason other than It's Pete's thing. My husband is a big time hunter. He goes all over the country to hunt...and he prefers the "real man" hunting with a bow and arrow. (that's my interpretation of it...the "real man"...not his) Anyways, he's also a licensed hunting guide. He's always dreamed of making money by doing what he loves. (hmmmm don't we all?) Anyways, his dream is becoming reality. He's leased 900 acres of land about an hour southwest of our house. He's fencing this property and stocking it with wild boars and exotic sheep and goats. It's going to be a place where guys come up and pay him to hunt these animals. So for the last 6 or 8 months that's been all he's doing. We still have no fence up, but we're (or he's) getting there. We're hoping that this can be a really prolific source of income for us and hopefully within a year or so, I should be able to stay home. Hooray! that would be wonderful! Hunting inside a fence is not his preferred method of hunting, but he's done the research and guys will pay mega bucks to do it. I say, whatever works! And do does Pete. So, Melissa...that's what the ranch is. And one of these days I'll get to posting the pics of it... It's pretty cool.
Yesterday was Pete's birthday...he's 30. I've been making fun of him cuz he's 4 months older than me and so for 4 more I get to tease! So, he's in the bathroom last night and he's rubbing his elbow and complaining that he's hurt it...He's doing all the inspecting of the elbow as he can, you know, trying to figure out the source of his pain....SO I say "Jeeze, only a few hours of being 30 and you're already starting to fall apart! It's all downhill from here!" I didn't realize it would happen so fast! Just kidding, for all you that are older than 30, I'm just teasing. Like I said, I've only got 4 more months to go. I also made the ugliest cupcakes you have ever seen in honor of his birthday. Not on purpose, mind you. It was completely random...they just turned out horribly ugly. But we both got a good laugh out of it. So that was good!
Also, if you're just stopping by here....You've got to check this out. We're doing the big reveal tomorrow, so make sure you stop by!

Random thoughts for Tuesday...

*Ever feel like every ones brain has turned to mush except yours?*
*Are you defined by the music you listen to? I mean, what if I told you I loved Gangsta Rap? Would you still be my friend?* I don't like gangsta rap, by the way. But say "gangsta" out loud...do it! For reals...it's just fun to say. What other words are fun to say? What words give you the creeps? I had a friend that hated the word "rub". She said it gave her the heeby geebies. It is quite an unattractive word. There's a few words out there that kind of do that to me. Like "pussy cat". Who the heck came up with that? I guess it's 2 words. I'm not trying to be vulgar..but I think that's where my dislike of that word stems from...if you get my drift.
See, I told you this would be random.
I'm beginning to really like my new job. SO much less stress. But I'm used to so much more, that this gets kind of boring. But I don't want to jinx myself. Apparently we are uncharacteristically "slow" right now. Can you sense the hint of boredom in this post? Oh yes, it is there.
So I was supposed to post again over the weekend, we got busy and I just didn't find the time. We went up to the ranch Saturday. Amazing, but I had never been up there before. My husband spends almost all his time up there and yet I had never been. I wish I could post the pictures here from work....Man, this place is way nicer than I imagined! And seriously, Pete has got his work cut out for him. My goodness 900 acres is a lot bigger when you actually see it for real. He is up there at least 3 days a week and works his butt off 90% of the time he's doing it all by himself. I love seeing him absolutely determined to do this, and get it done, and be successful. He's always been that way...he never does anything half way. He decides on something and he goes for it full force. 110% all the time. I do not posses any of those qualities. I guess that's what makes us good together. We balance each other out. It has been a really tough 7 or 8 months through this journey. And honestly, I see at least another 8 or 6 months of the same stress. I have many, many moments of....well panic, really. That's just the way I am. Even though I've sensed a little panic in him too, Pete always holds it together and says everything is going to be alright. That's just the way he is. And, everything has been alright....really. He's got way more faith than I do. Seeing the ranch for myself gave me a better understanding of what's going on, and seriously how much work it really is. I have more respect for it and him now, I guess. It's going to be so awesome once they get done. And hopefully with in a couple of years, I'll be singing a sweeter tune...from my living room and not an office cubicle!
Anyways, that's about all I've got for now...back to boredom. :D

There's a first time for everything...

See that big gash on his forehead? It actually looks worse in person than it does in this picture. He got is first really bad owie the other day. Jake's 6 year old cousin, Blake, threw a rock at him. Hit him strait in the head. In Blake's defense, Jake did throw a rock at him first. BOYS. *huh* That's all I have to say about that! This certainly will not be the last time this happens. And being the good scrapper mom I am, of course I had to take pictures! LOL! I think he should have gotten stitches...but Pete was certain he'd be just fine. We'll see. I think he just wanted him to have a big "manly" scar on his forehead. When I got to my MIL's house (about an hour after the tragic accident of aforementioned rock throwing) Jake was all laid out on the couch milking it for all it was worth. What a good kid! ha ha ha!! He was pretty traumatized by the whole thing...I guess there was a lot of blood. When I came in through the garage, I noticed a very bloody towel right next to the washer. Anyways, Jake gets up off the couch and he starts limping. My MIL and I just look at each other and share a private chuckle. It was just so funny. Later we get in the car and Jake says "momma, my feet don't work very well anymo". I said, "they don't?" Jake: "No, I got a lot of blood on my head and now my feet don't work anymo". Oh really?! He just cracks me up with the stuff he comes up with. He really is fine, I was kind of freaked out by the whole thing at first, but they are boys and this will happen again and now looking back at it I can laugh. Please don't think I'm the worst mom because I'm laughing at my child's pain!
Another funny story about Jake...The other day he's getting undressed to take a bath. He says, "momma, I got two balls". "oh yeah?" I say. I'm thinking "get your mind out of the gutter, Corey! I'll turn around and he will have 2 rubber bouncy balls...right?" Wrong. Jake: "yeah, see they're right here on my body!". As he jingles them, laughing, just like any man would. Yeah, Blake taught him that one too. What is the world coming to when a three year old boy knows he's got balls?! Maybe I'm naive.
I've got some more stories, but I'll post again tomorrow. :D

A new layout and some Easter Pics

I finally did some scrapping! I feel like I haven't done anything in forever except the CJ. This one was highly inspired by page 66 of Ali's patterned paper book. I just happened to have the same sized photo and that same 7 gypsies stickers. I really like how this turned out, but I'm thinking it may be a little too busy. I love the colors and the patterned papers though. (All Scenic Route). Along with Jake are our twin neighbors who are also 3. They're names are Ciao (sounds like Kyle) and Lucas. Jake loves them and wants to play and eat at their house every day. Their parents are super great neighbors and they love that Jake just makes himself right at home over there. It's so funny, since the time change and the nicer weather we are all outside playing when we get home from work...Anyways, Paula (their mom) always makes an extra plate of dinner for Jake and all three boys sit and eat dinner together. They really are the nicest people. It's so nice to have such great neighbors.

Here are a couple of favorite shots from Easter. Megan wasn't very photogenic that day, but Jake sure was! This one is my favorite:

We tried to get Megan to look all springy cute with a flower...but all she really wanted to do was eat it. Here's all the girl cousins: Not the best picture, but this is Hannah, Faith (she's holding Meg), and Caitlin.

Jake running to get the golden egg:

Here's one of me and Meg, just for good measure. I don't post pics of myself too often and this one is just me holding the camera out in front of us:
That's my new favorite GAP hat. It's become my regular Saturday attire! Haven't posted any pics in a long while, so I loaded this post up. Have a great Sunday!

Maroon 5 - Makes Me Wonder Full Video

*Ahhhhh, Friday*

So I figured out how to post a YouTube video here...quite easy actually! I've flipped my radio station..Been listening to....I guess they are calling this "Alternative Adult Rock"...whatever! I like it, that's all that matters! This song is currently making me happy, happy. I just wanna dance when ever it comes on...and I'm not a good dancer so that could be scary! This is Maroon 5 and I guess they haven't released a new album in 5 years or something. This is the new single. Happy, fun car dancing song. You know the kind of song...the kind of song that makes you keep dancing even at the red lights and you don't care that everyone is watching you! Actually, now that I think of it...this song totally reminds me of the Roller Rink. It totally has a turn the lights off, strobe light, roller rink, disco feel to it.

I'm in a good mood...can you tell? It's Friday and it feels good...PMS is gone...serotonin level is up...2 whole days ahead with nothing but...nothing. What could be better?...well lets not go into that...lets be happy with what we have now, huh?

I bought our tickets to go to Hawaii last night! woo hoo! I can not wait! I've never been anywhere off the continental US. I'm so flippin excited. We don't go until September, but that is ok...I'm still trying to lose weight! Some of you might know that I've been kind of on a diet since January. I haven't really talked a bunch about it, basically because I haven't wanted to jinx myself. But guess what? I think I've lost about 10 pounds! ( I say I think, because I don't own a scale and I'm too cheap to buy one! ) But I've dropped a pants size! People are starting to notice too. 3 times this week my MIL told me how "skinny" I look. Now, I wouldn't go that far...I am FAR from skinny, but someone is noticing and that feels so good. *smile* It's been 4 months since I've had a soda. I love Coca-Cola...especially from a fountain. This is the one part of my "diet" that I have not cheated on...not even once in 4 months! I can not help but be proud of myself. Even my mom can't believe it. Honestly, I think this is the only reason I've lost weight. Because I really haven't changed my eating habits all that much. I was limiting myself to 1700 calories a day but I have pretty much forgone that in the past month because of the stress of the new job and such. Starting monday, I'm back on baby! All the way. 1700 calories. I can do it ...it's easy, really. No more cheating...lose another 10 pounds. Woo Hoo! White sandy beaches, a cool breeze, palm trees, and a cute tankini that I don't look like a heffer in, here I come!

The Bachelor: As requested by Jude...and as promised from my last post...My personal commentary:

The Bachelor...first of all, I didn't even know this show still existed. I mean haven't they had like ZERO success rate? Oh wait, there was Trista and Ryan right? But technically she was the 'Bachelorette' so I don't think that counts. Anyways, I went ABC.com the other day to catch up on LOST and saw they had a new show posting in the "full episodes" and I realize it's: The Bachelor, An Officer and a Gentleman. Good grief, could they get anymore cheezy? Most of the girls probably weren't even alive when that movie was out....Wait, do they even know it was a movie? So yeah anyways, of course I had to watch it! LOL!! I both love and hate this show...always have. I love it because, darn it, It's just darn good TV! I mean the guy is freaking HOT. This one they have this time is a lieutenant in the Navy and a Dr, AND a 6 time Iron Man Triathlon finisher, AND a humanitarian charity guy. Oh yeah, and he's hot. I hate is voice though. He has absolutely no charisma. This show is fun because even though you pretty much know it's all a joke, you can't help but hope he keeps picking that one girl you like and that maybe, just maybe it really will be true love. And I love this show because it's just so fun to watch all these bitches (for lack of a better word) battle it out...they are so stupid. They read off their bios and they are all med students or lawyers or have a masters degree. And yet they are mostly all stupid whores. Or at least the show portrays them as such. I mean seriously, how in the world could 25 women all "have feelings" for or "really feel a connection" with one guy? Come on..we all know you just want some more face time! What always gets me is the after the 2nd or 3rd rose ceremony there's always that one girl who is just sobbing, she's completely beside herself because she didn't get a rose and she says through her sobs, "i really felt like i was falling in love with him...I never thought I could feel this way so fast"...sob, sob sob...Come on, you've know the guy 3 days and 15 other girls are dating him! I can't help it though, as much as I hate it, I keep coming back for more! Even Pete gets sucked into it. A couple of times last year he stayed up to watch it when I fell asleep! LOL! This show always seems to prove 2 things to me: 1) girls are mean and stupid. And 2) no matter what they say, guys will always like the fake boobs. Anyways so that's how i feel about it. Just good smut TV!

Have a wonderful weekend!

Small doses people and the Bachelor and PMS

Hi everybody! Yeah, a midweek post! Things are settling down a bit...which is so good. I'm learning my job well. It's actually the same thing I was doing before, a little less responsibility, and just a new computer system and work environment. It's good. Commute....still bad, but I don't want to complain any more about it.
I feel like I've got a lot to report....or a lot of things on my mind anyway. I even sent myself a "Note to Self" email today from work so I could remember the things I wanted to get out! I'll start with PMS. Good Lord, do I ever hate PMS! LOL! This is probably my worse attribute. One week out of every month I am a complete and udder witch...not to mention an overly sensitive blubbery boob. Yeah. You guessed it...this is the week. I feel sorry for my husband and children and all others who have to spend more than 2 minutes with me during this week! Note to self: next time you decide to start a new job...make sure is right after "the PMS week" so you have ample time to adjust before the next PMS week! *sigh* Everything is going fine, really....Yesterday was just one of those overly sensitive days, and it got to me a little. But today was much better and I'm not going to dwell, so I'll just move on. I know it was all about the PMS and nothing else. You know how menopausal women get all weepy when they think they're not going to have their period anymore? I just don't really get that. Take it....it's fine with me! I will not miss it.
Moving on....Small Doses People....Do you know what I mean by that? Do you know someone in your life who fits this description? They are really great people, and you sincerely like them, but you can only take so much of them....you can only be around them for so long before your emotionally drained, or dare I say, annoyed. Know anyone like that? Luckily, I don't know many...but I just added one to my list. Michelle. She's a lady that I work with...the lady that is training me. Michelle and I worked together at the old company but in separate departments....Honestly now that I think about it, I never really spent more than maybe 10 or 15 minutes at one time with her at the old job. As I said we had different job functions and we would stand at chit-chat for a few and then go back to our desks. Anyways I really do like her. She's older, in her late 40's but you wouldn't really know it. She's a cool person, very smart and she and I come from similar back grounds. We were both in child care/education and ran summer camp programs before we came into banking. So we have good things in common. She also has the best shoes and the best jewlery! But here is where the "small doses" comes in. This is why I get a little annoyed....She is very opinionated (not always a bad thing) and she is very much your typical "Californian". She is very liberal and doesn't hesitate to let you know that. I consider myself to be very conservative. So anyways Michelle finds it okay to push her liberal political views on everyone....let me take that back...She assumes everyone thinks the same way she does. Take President Bush, for example...she has no problem bashing the heck out of him openly in the office. Now, we may (well maybe not, I wouldn't want to assume) but I think the general population would agree that Bush is probably not going to go down in history as one of the "greatest leaders of our time". That being said, I don't think it's ok to just go around thinking everyone hates him and say horrible things about him all the time. She's the kind of person that would totally challenge you if you didn't agree with her, because to her, if you don't agree with what she's saying...you're wrong. And she's not the kind to back down. In the 2 weeks that I've been there, she's brought politics up 3 or 4 times, and she always looks for a laugh when she says something bad about Bush. I hate it! I end up just turning around and excusing myself from the conversation. That's the only thing I know how to do. It works, but just listening to it eats at me! Another conversation we had: You mom's out there will get a kick out of this... Michelle says there is "No such thing as 'Stomach Flu'. She says it's always food poisoning. Yeah. All you moms out there who spent a whole week in February trying to get the puke smell out of your house (or RV *wink*) raise your hands! Do you think there is no such thing as stomach flu?... I rest my case. But Michelle gets her last word in by saying "well, that's what I was told", and gives me that *you're a dumb ass* look. hmm I don't think so. So besides her forceful opinions and her having to know it all, I do like her. She is really funny, and a fun person. But in Small Doses. Do you think this is just a symptom of the PMS?
I was going to write a little bit about what I though of the show the Bachelor...but this is getting rather lengthy and I've still got to get in the shower so I think I'll just end with this....Have ya'll been to Chrissy's blog? She is just the sweetest thing. I know she's been kind of feeling down for a while, but I think she's coming out of it. I feel happiness when I read her words. Anyways, today she wrote the most endearing post about all of her blog buddies. I had been thinking of doing the same thing myself and she said it all perfectly. The Internet has become such an amazing avenue, and this blog thing has turned out to be way more than I ever expected. Just one post on Ali's challenge and *poof* instant friends. And I mean that sincerely, you are my friends and I hope we all might be able to meet IRL some day. I must admit, I was a little sad to find out that Chrissy was not going to make it to California this time around. But only for my own selfish reasons. The thought of a new friend to show around, and two adorable boys to play with Jake, excited me. BUT, I am so happy to know they are going to Seattle. Chrissy, I just know it's going to be great up there! I am so excited for you and Sean! I know it was God's plan for you all.
Ok, I'm off...have a wonderful Friday!
***edited to add: I will eventually stop talking about my job. I promise!

Wow, so it has been a whirlwind of a week! Not necessarily bad though. I feel like I have been kind of a whiner lately...I don't really mean to be that way. I just stress a little sometimes and need to vent. So I'll start off with Monday. As I had mentioned before, I have lost my Social Security card. Big no-no...you know?! Anyways there are several other documents that are acceptable to prove your identity....such as your birth certificate..Well, yeah I didn't have that either. And the next one was a passport...Well, I've never been anywhere where I needed a passport so I never got one. Craziness. So I show up Monday empty handed. I was told on Friday that I had to have either my SS card or my birth certificate Monday morning or they were going to have to send me home. I decided to go in anyways even if I didn't have anything...because how bad would that have looked if I didn't even come in? Bad in my opinion. Anyway....LONG story....I ended up driving over 200 miles that day! First I went to work...my office is about 40 miles one way. Then I get there, they say go take care of this before you come back...So I go to a near by SS office....They tell me I don't have the right documentation....That they need to see my marriage license...Ok well I know where that is! So I drive ALL the way back home (40 more miles) Pick up my marriage license, Then I decide to go to this SS office near my house because I figure if they're not going to help me until I get my birth certificate, there's no reason in going all the way back out to the office. So I drive over to the Manteca SS office (about 15-20 miles) This is where my luck starts turning around...There are a TON of people in the office waiting. But for some reason I got lucky on which numbers they were calling. I only waited maybe a half hour at the most. I don't even think it was that long. The lady that helped me was so nice. I think the fact that I walked up to her window and presented myself well and smiled helped big time. Come to find out, I didn't need anything the other office told me I needed. She fixed me right up. Of course she couldn't just give me a new card right there...they have to mail them out...but she did give me a certified letter stating that I could work. Momma always said you get more flies with honey than with....well you know! So then I drive all the way back to work (60 miles) They finally decide that what I had was good enough for now and decided to let me work! *whew!* One big huge stress off my shoulders! And in other good news...I got my card in the mail today...4 days! Pretty good service coming from the government! Ha ha! The rest of the week as been just a bunch of training. We had 2 full days of in class training today and yesterday...that was another really good way to get acquainted with the people I work with (even though I've worked with them all previously) and it also gave me a chance to learn a lot about the company I'm working for. So it was good!
I am feeling SO disconnected though! Man, I can't really get on the Internet at work...Well, I can, but some sites are "forbidden". And, I can't check my email from there. THAT totally sucks! I hate that I can't check in on my bloggy friends every day! I actually so look forward to seeing what you guys are all up to. You all have become my friends, and are so supportive and CREATIVE! Man, I miss that every day inspiration I would get from you all! I have been trying every night to come and check in, but it's just impossible for me to leave a comment for everyone or reply to all the emails. This week I've had an average of 10 emails a day when I get home! One day I had 40! No I'm not kidding! (i love email!) I love it! But I just can't find the time to do all my wifely/motherly duties and hang out online! BUMMER! Time is certainly becoming a great commodity around here! So, needless to say, I think my blog posts might be reduced down to weekends only.
At least until things settle down a little. I sure hope you all hang in there with me! I love, love, love all the comments you leave and the emails and all the goodness you bring. I also love reading all of your blogs too and I'll comment when ever I can! Thanks for being such great friends!
Wow, this is super long! Hope you all hung in!
Have a wonderful Easter weekend! Jake and I are doing eggs tomorrow, I will for sure take some pictures!

My new favorite recipe

I love to bake. Funny, I don't have much of a sweet tooth per say, but I do love to bake. I found this recipe on Food Network.com. They are perfect for Sunday mornings.
Mix-in-Muffins
1 1/2 cups flour
1/3 cup sugar
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
Sift together dry ingredients with a fork or whisk. Add:
1 stick of melted butter
1 cup sour cream
1 large egg
1 tsp vanilla
This is the base, then feel free to add in what ever you like, blueberries, cranberries, apples, banana's...whatever! They are so moist and dense. Yum, yum, yum! For a special sweet treat I add chocolate chips.
Bake in a 400* preheated oven for about 20 minutes. A toothpick should come out clean.
Just thought I'd pass this on. This is my new favorite thing right now! (No, it's not on my diet!) But I suppose you could make them with wheat flour, splenda and non fat sour cream.
Enjoy!

Transitions

So, yesterday was my first day at my new job. Has anyone ever had a good "first day"? On a scale of 1-10, 10 being really bad, I give my first day about a 6. So, it really wasn't that bad, but it really wasn't that good either. So I walk in the office right at 8:01 and everyone is already huddled around having a meeting. The best part about the whole thing is that I already know everyone in the office. Every one but 2 guys used to work with me at the old company. They all left about a year/year and a half ago to come to this company. It's a much smaller office. I am the 12th person on staff. The old place there were about 300 when business was real high, but in the last few years we've been about 80-100 people. Anyways, a lot more than 12! So as soon as I get there, they ask me to join the huddle and my cell phone beeps. The battery is going dead. Crap. So I of course explain what the beeping was and apologize for the interuption. Then they go into this big speech about cell phones and how if you have one you better keep it on vibrate and how Su, the big boss hates them and if she hears it in her office she'll come out and tell you you better turn it off. So I'm like ahh jeeze! I'm already getting in trouble! Then of course you know when you start a new job you're supposed to have 2 forms of ID...Hello! Drivers license and Social Security card. So like, when was the last time I really needed my SS card....Ummmmm I'd say 6 years ago when I started my old job. And ummmm where do you think that card is? Ummmmmmm yeah I have no idea either. CRAP. crappity crap crap. For reals, I have no idea where it is. Yeah, I'm almost 3-0 and I can't keep track of the important stuff. What the holey heck is wrong with me? So yeah, now I'm totally embarrassed again. You know everyone is going *idiot* in their heads. I mean I was, for sure. So the big boss says "you have to have either that or your birth certificate on Monday morning or I'm going to have to send you home." Well let's just say I'll be standing in line at the SS office Monday morning. Yep, I'm completely mortified. (please don't lecture me...I've heard it over and over from my husband and my mother, I already know what a loser I am, thank you very much!) The rest of the day was relatively pleasant. Everyone in the office is SUPER nice and welcoming. They even "initiated" me. The guy who sits across from me used to sit in my cubicle. So anyways, I'm emptying out my box of desk stuff and organizing my drawers. I open the top drawer and there are 2 rubber rats gazing up at me! He left them there on purpose to scare me. I guess this is what they do to all the new people. Cute. So anyways, I see the rats, don't make a sound and casually look over my cube at Antonio...."umm so are these your rats?" I say. He was laughing so hard at my casualness. He's like "you weren't even scared?!!!" Umm no, #1 I have a 3 year old boy...and #2 I used to work with all these people...I remember what they are like! This is like an everyday thing for me! So, it was good they did that. If they didn't tease me, they wouldn't like me. They're all a really good group of people and I know as soon as I figure out everything it's going to be fine. The absolute worst part of everything? The commute. Dude, it took me exactly 59 minutes to get from the parking garage to my MIL's driveway. That extra 1/2 hour of work makes a gigantic difference. Plus my new office is about 3 miles farther down than the old one. That's 3 miles of down town traffic at 5 o'clock with a stoplight every 50 feet. Big, big difference and it totally sucks. Please pray that something will change in this department for me. I would really love to have that 1/2 hour back. It really would make a world of difference.
Nothing much going on around here except for crazy tearing apart of the house looking for the SS card or the birth certificate. My Mom and her friend forever, Patty came over today. It was a nice visit. We had great weather too about 80* and a warm breeze. I also gave away all of Megans clothes she's grown out of. This was great. Girls, I had 4 bags full!!! Yeah 4. Meg is only 7 months old! (I did not buy all of these clothes. Most of them are hand-me-downs from my best friend. She has 2 little girls and one is just 6 months older than Megan) I had this huge pile of clothes behind her bedroom door because I wasn't quite sure what I was going to do with it. I didn't really have anyone to give it to because I didn't know anyone who was expecting a baby. Well the girl who sits next to my mom at her office just found out she's having a girl in August. So she took everything! Megan's room looks SO clean now. I love it.
Anyways, that's about all I have to report. Hope your weekend is warm and bright!

*Circle Journal*

Ok just a quick post. I feel like I have stuff to talk about, but I'm not so much in the mood right now. Tons of stuff on my mind as I finnish out 6 years at my present job tomorrow. *sigh* Life is all about changes, right? I'm thinking of a layout in my head inspired by Miss Ali's latest Studio A article in CK about transitions. This year is a huge year of transistions for me...Starting with this new job and I already see many, many more in the near future.

Anyways so tonight I just feel like relaxing. So I'm gonna put these monkeys to bed and cuddle up with my book while I wait for Pete to get home from church...Wednesday night prayer meeting.

So here's the CJ...I'm gonna try and get it off to Jude tomorrow or Friday

It's going to be really bulky and probably won't even close by the time we're through, but that's ok!

*Music*

This is going to be sort of a different post than what I usually write about, but i've been thinking about music a lot lately so I thought I'd write a little bit about the music I like. (I'm also waisting time at my old job....I only have 3 more days....start the new one on Friday) I have a very eclectic taste in music. I like just about everything, except rap or hip hop, though some of it is ok. Anyways, what got me thinking about music was this: Have you seen the new show on ABC called October Road? It's pretty good. And it has an awesome soundtrack. It's about this guy who leaves his home town to travel Europe for 6 weeks right after high school graduation and then never comes back. Now 10 years later (present day) he comes back. I guess that's the gist of it...though of course there is more to the story. Anyways, so in the pilot episode it's mostly a flashback to 1997. The main guy is standing on his front lawn saying goodbye to his girlfriend and his buddies. It's kind of one of those defining moments...the end of an era and the start of something new. As he drives away they start playing an awesome song...Foreigner, I think. I love this band. I totally love classic rock, but I was thinking....this is supposed to be 1997, right? Not 1977? I mean, if you're doing a period show, shouldn't the music you choose go with that period? At least sort of? I graduated in 1995, so I was thinking, OK....where is the Green Day? The Counting Crows? Hootie maybe? Or what about the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Am I wrong in thinking that? Like I said, the song was awesome and it seemed to fit the mood, I just didn't think it said 1997 to me. Gawd, 1997 like wasn't THAT long ago was it? Makes me feel old to know they are doing a period show about people my age. Scary! I'm not old! Anyways, the show isn't too bad, and the ex-girlfriend is the girl that used to be Eric's girlfriend on That 70's Show. I really like her. Check it out on ABC.com The first 2 episodes are there for free.
Ok, lets talk about other music that I like right now...(i'm probably just going to start rambling now and listing off music I like. Check it out if you want, comment if you know what I'm talking about or if you have some music you think I should check out. Or whatever! feel free to read on or stop here!) I don't buy a lot of CD's. Mostly because I'm cheap. But also because I always think of something else to buy (like scrapbook stuff!) If you were to ask me what type of music I listen to, I'd probably say Country. It's on in my car about 90% of the time. But I'm a station flipper, if I find a station that is playing good music, doesn't matter what it is, if I like it I'll stick around and listen a while! In the past year or so...well maybe more... there have been some really good new country artists coming out. Taylor Swift. She's 17 years old I think. Gorgeous! plays acoustic guitar and has a beautiful voice. This girl is going to be really famous. Sugarland. Man, I love them. Every song they release is just awesome. Rascall Flatts. The Wreckers. Remember Michelle Branch? Yeah, she's gone country. She and this other girl now make up this band and they are really good. She should have been country from the start. Alan Jackson. Never thought I'd say that. I never really liked him too much. In my opinion he would have one or two good songs, and then one really crappy one. I love Midnight in Montgomery, but I hate Way down yonder on the Chattahoochi (or whatever) (i know, lots of people love that song. but i don't). But he has two really good songs out right now. Like Red on a Rose and A Woman's love. Both are so, so good! Keith Urban. Hot. He may be a drug addict/alcoholic but the guy makes awesome music. Derks Bently. He's the next Kenny Chesney. (flipping the switch now) Kelly Clarkson. I never watched the first season of American Idol. I always thought she was pop music but, I think she has more edge than just pop...I don't know what to call her. A friend sent me a copy of her latest CD. I don't even know what it's called. But it is good. I like every song on it. (how often does that happen?) Chris Daughtry. The bald rocker from last year's American Idol. He got kicked off way too early in my opinion. I liked Taylor Hicks, but I liked Chris a lot better. He's got his own band and goes by Daughtry. They do a cover of Sunday Bloody Sunday by U2. Wow, it is so good. They rock it out.
Johnny Cash. Now, I will admit I jumped on this band wagon after I saw the movie Walk the Line. (one of my favorites) I grew up listening to Country music, and I knew the typical JC songs....Folsom Prison, Ring of Fire, Cry, Cry, Cry...But after watching that movie, it was like I rediscovered him or something. Made me remember that I just love his music. Trisha Yearwood. She has always been my favorite female singer. She is soulful, blues/country. She is way more than How do I live. Check her out.
Other random thoughts of music goodness: The Eagles, Journey, Bon Jovi, Kid Rock, Alanis Morriset, Guns 'n' Roses, Poison, Warrant, Cinderella (I have that Monster Ballads of the 80's CD. LOVE IT!) Heart, Pat Benitar, Oingo Boingo, U2, Inxs, The Beatles, Marvin Gay, Chicago, Boston, Sheryl Crow, Collective Soul, Pearl Jam, Live, Motley Crue, Metalica, Styx, Stone Temple Pilots, Tori Amos, The Bangles, Whitney Houston (before the drugs got to her...or maybe before Bobby got to her), Janet Jackson-rember Controll? That was good. Madonna, Michael Jackson-but only in the 70's and 80's. Nirvana-they were my favorite in 8th grade. Who doesn't like Smells like Teen Spirit? Ben Folds. Hmmmmmm well there is so much more, but ya'll are probably getting bored now!
Kind of a weird post huh? Well that's it I guess. I just filled out my last paperwork to terminate my employment here. So I guess it's totally official now. *sigh*....of relief and sadness too.
Hope you all are having a good day. Let me know what you think of my crazy mix of music. Oh and Jude...My CJ will be coming to you soon! I'm mailing it out Friday :)

Officially

I am the slowest scrapper. I have now really come to realize this! I broke out the velum, the paint, the ink....just about everything in my stash this weekend...but, I'm still not done with my Circle Journal. *sigh!* I wish I had pictures of the 2nd mess I made...I had previously cleaned up the mess in my post below, but now there is a new and improved mess today! For some reason this project is really teaching me a lot about my style and my ART. I broke out a lot of things that I've had literally FOREVER and never used. I brought out old tools and found them to be new and exciting again. I've really had to "get creative" with my pages for the small space I chose in the 6x6. Even though I'm not done yet...I'm loving the results. Some mistakes have turned into some unexpected greatness. I got a great texture out of velum that I painted on. I got all freaky as I'm painting...all of a sudden the edges of the velum start curling up. "CRAP! what the heck!" Well after my {tiny} panic attack, I took it upstairs and decided to iron it. It turned out pretty cool. It's still wrinkly...which gives it great texture, but at least now it's flat. I'll post pictures once I'm all done. (hopefully that will be sometime this week!)
Not much else went on this weekend...I did go shopping and got some great new shoes from Gap. New shoes always make a girl happy!
*update on job situation* After thinking about it long and hard, I decided to take the new job. I'm excited and I think it's going to work out great. I think it's going to be a lot less stress so that is good. Of course though, right after I had mentally made my decision to go...I start getting all this recognition from my boss and co-workers. A few of my loan officers sent me gifts...Like I got $100 gift card to Nordstroms the other day and then today I get $300 in American Express checks from another one. I feel bad because they don't know I'm leaving yet. I haven't really told anyone except my boss. I guess I won't be getting any of these perks anymore! Hopefully there will be some new perks at the new job? I feel like I'm deceiving everyone. I told my boss that I'm going to be able to work at home...which right now is not true. Hopefully in the very near future I will be able to. But for right now, it's no. The only reason why I told him that, was because I didn't want to hear the speech that they give everyone who ever tries to leave here....you know the one..."the grass isn't always greener on the other side".... etc..etc..etc... I had already mentally made my decision...I had already done all the weighing of good points and bad points...I just didn't want anyone to try and change my mind. So I made something up that I knew they couldn't come back and say anything about. Know what I mean? But now, I have all these managers coming up to me, congratulating me and telling me how lucky I am. So now I feel really bad! I'm going to have to do a little repenting for my fib.
Well anyways, there you have it...not much going on around here!

I spy...

A circle journal. Anyone else see it? Keep looking.....Just kidding, it's not here. But this was the aftermath left after a night of creating. At least you can see a bit of table peeking through. This is only half of it. The left hand side of the table is completely covered. Anyone else feeling the pressure to show off your best work? Man, I am for sure. I didn't wanna look, but since she posted it, I just had to look at Chrissy's and OMG it's beautiful! I've already learned something in this project. Next time do a little bigger than 6x6. For some reason it's feeling a little too small for me. I've finished my cover, instruction and sign in pages. Girls, let me tell ya, the sign in page might be a little funky. I think my journal is going to be a little bulky by the time it's done but, that's OK! I've got to start working on my theme layout. Still not quite sure how I'm going to approach it. Still feeling the 6x6 might be too small for some reason. I'm just a slow scrapper I think. (thank goodness we have a whole month to complete a project!) I'm constantly moving things around, changing patterned papers...that kind of thing. It will all come together though. I'm so anxious to see everyone else's journals. I just know this is going to be a real learning experience for me and a chance to step out of my creative box.
In other news....Well, I mentioned the other day that I applied for a new job. Some of you who've been stopping by here a while know that I had major anxiety going back to work after 5 months off for maternity leave, and you also know that since going back to work, I've been pretty unhappy. Anyways an opportunity came up for me to work for another company doing the same thing, but for a lot more money. Sounds perfect right? Actually, it would even be less responsibility than what I have now...So still sounding perfect, right? Well I was all ready to accept the position, when they hit me with this: my hours would be 8:30am to 5:30pm, but no earlier than 8-5. *uggg* Right now I work from 8-4:30. See, I have almost an hour commute, so by the time I get home after picking up the kids, it's almost 6 o'clock. Then it's a race to get dinner on the table, dishes cleaned, kids in the tub and then in bed by 8. So I'm just torn right now....do I sacrifice another 1/2 hour of family time(probably more like 45 minutes because traffic is worse at 5 than at 4:30) for a few more bucks in my pocket? I just don't know. I want to take the new job because frankly, my current job just sucks and I feel like I need a change. But the thing is, what I really want, is to just be home. I almost feel like if I take a new job, then it means I'm not working towards my ultimate goal of being home. Does that make sense? Like, I guess if I take this new job then it would be like I'm pursuing a career instead of focusing on my family. But I have no plans on quiting to stay home any time soon. Technically, my husband is unemployed! I mean reality is, it's not happenin' for a while! ya know?! *sigh*....*Big sigh*...Fact is, I hate change. Change scares me to death and that's what's really holding me back on making this decision. *sigh again* I can make up a thousand excuses to stay where I am...and I can make a thousand more for going to the new job. But I just can't make a decision either way. Why is that? What's wrong with me? I guess I'm going to sleep on it again....one more night. I have to tell them tomorrow yes or no. Hopefully the answers will come in my sleep.